1 Corinthians 13:4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never fails. NKJV
God’s love does not demand its own way for it is not self seeking or full of self interest and self ambition. Love does not seek its own interest. Love is unselfish and it does not grasp for oneself, one’s own pleasure, profit, or honor to the detriment of others. It is self-forgetful and joys in serving. It advances oneself but not entirely in unconcern for others growth and welfare.
The person who seeks his own described here which is the opposite of what love does is a person who will seek out whatever way they can or do anything to get their way. They will scheme, connive, lie, misrepresent facts, tell half truths, to make things work to their advantage and put themselves in the best light. They cleverly control and influence to steer things in their self interest. A person walking in love never does that for love is not unscrupulous or manipulative.
“Love does not seek its own” does not mean that a person following love does not seek his own well-being or happiness but that he doesn’t seek it exclusively or only. Love is not selfish or out for self satisfaction or self interest to the neglect of others or injury to others. Some people advance or go forward in their life with no regard for others, no regard for how their actions affect others, and no feelings at all for how their behaviors hurt others. Their only concern is that they get what they want and can do what they want to do.
Self seeking people lack the ability to understand and share the feelings of others but the love of God gives you consideration for others. Hebrews 10:24 says, “And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works.” Love considers attentively, gives careful consideration of, perceives clearly, and intensely thinks of others not just oneself. Some people only think of themselves and have little or no capacity to understand what others may be experiencing on a physical or emotional level. This will provoke people but not to good works. Only a love that seeks not its own can provoke others or spur them on to good works. Love is considerate, benevolent, and does not just look out for oneself. You’ve probably heard of the secret to J.O.Y. which is thinking in this order: Jesus, Others, and Yourself
Romans 5:5 And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.