Ecclesiastes 4:9, 10 Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.
Ecclesiastes 9:9 Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.
We’ve probably all heard the saying, “A marriage made in heaven.” It sounds so nice and romantic but marriages aren’t made in heaven but on Earth by two people committed to make it work. When we profess our marriage vows it was our commitment to make it work. If it was up to heaven alone why would we have to make a vow? Living joyfully with one another is possible but not without some effort. Having a good marriage isn’t automatic it is work and we have to labor. We cannot have a good marriage living on cruise control like we drive a car. Why does it take two laboring together, constantly making adjustments and at times repairs?
WE MARRIED A DEVELOPING PERSON
There are no perfect people to marry only developing people. No one is perfect and no one will do everything right all the time. Guess what? We are one of those imperfect people too. We all get joined together to another developing person. We marry someone else who has to learn to walk in the spirit and not the flesh. We are not primarily responsible for their wholeness but we are to be a helper, and not a hindrance. God intended us to appropriately depend on one another in marriage to a degree, but not over-dependence. Marriages work best when each partner has learned contentment and self sufficiency in their relationship to God first (Philippians 4:10 12; Psalm 62:5). Good marriages are not made by people who need one another so much as people who enjoy one another.
WE MARRIED A DIFFERENT PERSON
Not only the difference of male vs. female but different personality type, life experiences, upbringing and customs, different preferences and ways of doing things; different likes and dislikes; and different spiritual gifts. No matter who we marry in one sense it is like marrying a foreigner from a different country and culture. No two homes where we’ve been raised are exactly the same.
WE ARE MARRIED AND LIVING IN A WORLD WHERE THERE IS A DEVIL LOOSE
We are not in the Garden of Eden before the Fall into sin and we are not in Heaven yet. We are in a world where we are still exposed to a devil who roams about seeking whom he may devour, and who tempts every man. We can all give place to the devil in our lives and cause hurt to others. From the very beginning in the first marriage union of the first male and female, satan has been out to sever whatever God has joined. Husbands, your wife is not the enemy. Wives, your husband is not the enemy. Keep strife out, maintain agreement in your marriage, and resist the real enemy to your spiritual union, the devil, and he will flee.